If you are a bit of a gullible chap, and believe all the marketing messages that are fired at us daily, you’ll see a car as part of your identity.
Remember, it is important to share your new car-purchase on social media to let your ‘friends’ know what a man you are.
But how many mm can your car add to your manhood?
Audi TT
Basically a shit porsche, for birds.
WE score -10
BMW 2 series Definitely a car to impress your associates, and that girl in the office you’ve being trying to get into (despite the fact you’re married). Can also be a sensible and safe family car though, so loses a few WE points as a result.
WE Score +5
Subaru Impreza
YES! You are basically in the playstation 1 game with Colin Mcrae, except you are cooler. Bound to impress all the chavs and mid-life crisis 40 year olds that you know.
WE score +20
Range Rover
Must-have for every pimp and drug dealer. You’ll be the king of the road, unless someone pulls out with a more expensive version, in which case, you’ll be back feeling like the gimpy kid in school again. Again can double as a sensible family car for the yuppy or farmer, so loses points unless you make sure it features a white go faster stripe.
WE score +15
Mitsubishi Warrior
It says “Warrior” down the side of the bloody thing! What more can you ask for!? A ridiculously large engine and a bull bar maybe. ULTIMATE willy extension for anyone insecure about their manhood. I’m off to buy 2 of the fcukers…
WE Score +100
Remember, nothing says “I’m better than you” than overtaking someone at 100mph in a 50 zone; in a massive pick up! For extra man points, throw ‘builder stuff’ and tools in the back.
A car is supposed to keep you safe, and get you from A to B. Appreciate it, keep it clean and functioning, but don’t buy into the marketing BS: